I pushed really hard.
I worked all the time. I worked constantly.
This was a symptom of so many things.
Fear of not having enough
Fear of not being enough
Fear of the unknown.
I had little if any trust.
And then I just took a leap of faith.
I sold everything [ well mostly ]
I packed my bags.
And I left my comfort zone.
I had nothing prepared, no plans or strategies in place. No idea how
I would move forward, how I would find my way. I knew I would spend timein the UK but aside from that I didn't have a clue.
One thing I did find along my path was faith. Faith that I would be fine, faith that I would be more than fine. Faith that I would be guided if I just stopped pushing. All I needed was to trust.
And now I do.
As the days pass by, my role in life becomes clearer. I am slowly but surely finding my way, my purpose, my meaning for existing.
`I would like to say that I know all the answers but that simply is not true. There is so much more for me to learn, to experience, just to be. I have learned, finally, that no the amount of pushing will “move the dial further along”.
Even now, when I head over to my laptop I pause and ask myself
What are you doing
Why are you doing it
Is this “work” necessary?
The journey for me is just about “being quiet” and ‘listening”. Just being.
Curious, have you experienced this understanding or are you just “pushing”?